Hungry Like the Wolf

Have you ever been to a store and seen an article of clothing that you just had to have? Has your mouth ever watered at the sight of a particular dessert on display in one of your favorite restaurants? Was the feeling so strong that it felt like you would be willing to give up your first born child (Rapunzel style) just to get it? Well, I've been feeling like that lately, only the object of my eye is of the male persuasion...

I'm going to spare the short attention spans of my readers by making a long story short. About 4 months ago, I met a guy at my job (let's call him Joe) that took my breathe away the very first time I saw him. It sounds cliche, but that is the only way I can describe how I felt at that moment. It was like being struck by lightning (but without the charring part). He and I grew pretty close for awhile. Although things ultimately turned sour between us, I can't help but think about him. This is due to two key factors. Firstly, I still work with him. It's kind of hard to "wash that man right out of my hair", if you will, when I see him practically everyday. I know I brought this on myself as well. It's usually a given that one isn't supposed to "dip their pen in the company ink", but I simply couldn't resist. He was much too tasty to pass up, but I digress. Secondly, it's hard to not think about him when I still have feelings for him.

I don't know why this particular guy has had such an effect on me. I can only attest it to one thing; animalistic, pheromone-driven lust. It's almost indescribable in a way. When I saw him for the first time, I was so drawn to him. I noticed everything about him physically and knew I had to have him. For a short time, I did have him, but not long enough in my book. So here I am, single (again) and desperately trying to get him out of my mind. I know eventually that it'll all pass, but, as of yet, there is no end in sight. So, I ask you my dear readers, what can I do to speed up the process? What are the best ways to get over someone (besides crying into the dashboard while listening to Foreigner)? I can't wait to hear from you.

"Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?"

If there is one thing about dating and relationships that I can't stand, it's mixed signals. Whoever thought it was a good idea to bring uncertainty into the mix when it comes to matters of the heart needs a swift kick to the face with a cleat. Honestly, what good does it do, besides giving one the appearance of indifference (why is that even a good thing?)?. 

As of recent, my love life has been in quite a tizzy. To make a story short, I have been hanging in a state of perpetual limbo. I'm not really sure where I stand in my relationships (or semblances of them), and it is driving me mad. What ever happened to the days of true courtship? What about the days of making one's intentions known early in the relationship instead of fumbling with the details later, especially when the situation has become more complicated?

Case in point, I recently met this guy at a house party hosted by one of my friends. He seemed really nice and well put together, not to mention that I felt really intense chemistry between the two of us. Obviously he felt it too because he kissed me before the night was over. As we went our separate ways, his parting words were, "I'll be around". That was it. Honestly, what kind of ending is that? I was expecting us to exchange information, possibly make plans, the whole shebang, but I guess I was way ahead of myself. As you can tell (from the sheer ire wafting off of your computer monitor right now), I haven't had any contact with him since then. It's truly upsetting when someone with potential slips through my fingers. It's like having a bite of the sweetest treat, then learning that you might not get to have it ever again. 

Part of my frustration comes from the fact that, somehow or another, people believe that they are supposed to treat love like some sort of game. There are "The Rules" of dating, and people are supposed to "play hard to get". Why does it have to be this way? Why make something that is already complicated by nature even more difficult? It's like, "Hey, if this rubik's cube wasn't difficult enough already to solve, now you have to solve it blindfolded while upside down." I just don't see the benefit.  

The other part of my frustration comes from the fact that I'm a girl who has been suckered into some of "The Rules" as well. Because I have girl parts (yay girl parts!), I've been told by countless people that I shouldn't make the first move on guys. I feel forever bound to the role of the damsel in distress, helplessly waiting for the prince to save me (even if he does get sidetracked on his journey by playing his Xbox 360 for days on end). It's a trap I tell you!! If you wait patiently, sometimes the knight never shows up. Also, if you don't wait and try to be the proactive one, men lose interest because they miss "The Chase". If you pursue them, suddenly you aren't as appealing to them as you were had they tried to break their necks to get you.

So, here I sit, hoping to magically run into my mystery man again by chance, and I am hating every minute of it. I hate uncertainty, especially when it comes to dating. Does anyone else feel the same way? Have any of you had an experience similar to this? If so, tell me about it in the comments section. 

You're So Vain (You Probably Think This Post is About You)

I have a confession to make. I am sort of obsessed with the website "hotornot.com". It's not an extreme case, but enough to make me further question my sanity.

If you don't know, hotornot.com is a website where people rate the physical attractiveness of others on a 1-10 scale (1 being the lowest in attractiveness while 10 being the highest). Anyone who wants to can upload their own photo and get a "hotness" score of their own, which is subject to change with the amount of votes cast. When I first read about it, I thought it was quite clever. Everyone at some point in their lives has wondered about the magnitude of their own looks, wanted to know where they place on the physical beauty totem pole, if you will. Now that I have become well acquainted with the site, I realize that the system itself has many perks and flaws. On one hand, one's physical attractiveness (or lack thereof) is, in a way, verified. On the other hand, the ratings themselves are subjective, opening the doors for malice and bias.

I once knew a girl who, whenever she went on the site, automatically rated any girl as a 1. Even if a picture of Charlize Theron popped up, she would have given her a 1 as well. When I think about this, it makes me wonder just how accurate the scores are. I can only speak for myself when I say that I honestly try to give objective ratings of people whenever I cast them. Giving girls automatic ratings of 1 out of spite is not my style, but if I feel that a 1 is truly needed (*I haven't done this yet. I can't imagine what a person would have to look like in order to warrant a score of 1. Perhaps Chewbacca?), I will give it.

Having received my own hotness score, I couldn't help but think about how important good looks are in our society. If people are willing to subject themselves to this kind of evaluation, myself included, then it must be pretty valuable. Are we living in a world were we are all participants in an unspoken beauty pageant? And, if so, I wonder what state I am (maybe Virginia? I like Virginia!).

What do you think about this my faithful readers? Is the above true? Are we constantly being evaluated, and evaluating each other's looks? And, just for kicks and giggles, what physical attributes do you find to be the most attractive?

PS: If you want, you can follow the link below and find out your own attractiveness rating.

http://www.hotornot.com/